12gauge.com 2002

Amaze
Michael Caridi

People amaze me,
well some do anyway.
People that are super intelligent
like scholars,
mathematicians,
and professors.

Come to think of it professors
Are the type of people that
amaze me the most,
so super intelligent
in their field.

But let me get this straight,
the most well known professor of all,
was probably the one from
Gilligans Island,
this guy can make all sorts of shit,
out of trees and coconuts,
like hair dryers,
and washing machines,

in one episode he
even made a hot air balloon,

do you think that it ever occurred to this
"superman" of knowledge
that he might want to have a crack at,
well I don't know …maybe
knocking up a fucking boat.

I mean seriously what were these
idiots thinking,
I mean Mr.Howell,
he wasn't a stupid guy,
worth a fortune,
great business sense,
do you think he ever got off his arse to
see what the professor was doin '
about that boat?

I can see him now
"Excuse me professor, any chance of
converting that hot air balloon you
just whipped up into a boat?"

But he never asked,
none of them did,
What the Fuck was that all about?

Human nature, it amazes me…

I mean I have been asked the question before,
"If you were stranded on an island, and you
could only take three things what would they be?"

Well I can tell you this …anything I did take would
be useful to me in some way or another…
so sorry professor you just missed out.

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